Author: Michael

I have a wicked and dirty (some even say depraved) sense of humour! Somehow, innuendo, suggestion and general smut seem make their way into conversations in which I'm involved... I'll laugh at inappropriate things and make inappropriate remarks, though not usually at inappropriate times...
Written by Michael

One foot in the grave?

I fully acknowledge and accept the fact I’m fast becoming a grumpy old man, but I’ve just returned from the piss-house at work and someone before me has walked away from the sink having left the tap slightly on. Now, we’re not talking an occasional drip here; there’s a definite and significant egress of water happening. […]

Written by Michael

Even thieves have taste

A friend of mine recently told me a story regarding one of his mates who, back in the day, had his first ever car stolen. When he got to the spot where he’d left his prized possession, the only evidence that remained was a discarded Rick Astley tape, in the gutter, which the thief had […]

Written by Michael

Musical youth?

I’m officially old. Someone just posted a photo of some musical event happening somewhere later in the year, and I recognised precisely 0% of the artists listed. Whatever happened to Duran Duran, Whitesnake, Heart, Spandau Ballet, Human League, The Bangles, Cameo, Cutting Crew, Erasure, Huey Lewis & The News, Johnny Hates Jazz, Katrina & The […]

Written by Michael

Neknomination: My take

I’ve been pissed, but I’ve never needed anything more than sleep, water and a couple of paracetamols to get over it the following day. I’ve certainly never needed hospitalisation. Harmless, amusing challenges with no associated risk are one thing, but there’s a difference between having a drink (or indeed several) and drinking yourself (literally) to […]

Written by Michael

Roses are red…

As I read through the last tweets of Reeva Steenkamp I can’t help but feel sad over the unexpectedness & immediacy of death sometimes. #RIP

Written by Michael

Michael, OBE?

Gotta laugh at these New Years Honours lists. Seems any old bell can get a CBE, MBE or OBE these days… A convicted fraudster (who ‘turned his life around’ and now raises money for charity – yeah right), an indian restaurateur who has promoted indian cuisine (ok, I’ll let that one go – worthy enough) […]